The best thing anyone ever did for me was to give me this advice after my husband cheated on me. My immediate reaction when I discovered it was that I had to get divorced. I mean… that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? Having the freedom to get my head out of that space and make my own decisions led to forgiveness and allowed us to fix the problems in our relationship that got us to that point. Did it permanently change my ability to completely trust someone in a relationship? Yes. Would that same feeling have been applied to any future relationships if we’d divorced? Yes. Either way the damage was done and it became as much about healing ourselves as it did about healing our relationship. But I am SO thankful that we put that work in. A mistake made during a moment of weakness caused by a struggling relationship didn’t change all of the good we had. Ultimately I realized the choice was in my willingness to forgive, in his willingness to be vulnerable and for me to truly believe the deep sense of remorse he had and in feeling the confidence that he understood the deep and painful impact of his actions. We just had our 24th anniversary and I don’t regret my decision at all.
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