(highlight:: This can't be overstated. The common belief right now is that this just happens -- she believes it, a lot of people believe it too. We identify strongly with how we feel at a given moment, and sometimes we talk about ourselves like the way we've felt over a few months is just who we are. And society reinforces that with lies like "sex drives die in committed relationships."
Don't fall for it. Sex drives die because the context of a relationship has changed. But context can always change again. Your first year(s) in a relationship are easy-mode, because the context is inherently novel and exciting. But now is the real test: does this relationship make your partner feel safe, secure, and fulfilled? Does your partner possibly feel like your caretaker now? I'd believe you if you said you were still the same person they fell in love with, but is it possible they had an idealized image that didn't match the reality? And how far can/will you go to bridge that gap? If all else fails, has their ideal changed?)
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