R/DeadBedrooms - Comment by U/Dkotheryyyy on ”My HL Was Right in Our Db.”
!tags:: #lit✍/📰️article/highlights
!links::
!ref:: R/DeadBedrooms - Comment by U/Dkotheryyyy on ”My HL Was Right in Our Db.”
!author:: reddit.com
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Reference
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Notes
Changing mindset to be able to be around intimacy without expectations: I had to be my own primary source of love and acceptance so that intimacy or not, I'm ok. Gave up (literally despair helped here) my fantasy of my wife and started seeing her as she really is right now. Meant also seeing her as sometimes annoying, stupid, rude, etc. Also meant being curious about what really works for her and willing to accept that something can work one time, but not other times. I.e. she is a constantly changing mystery, so I am constantly in a state of curiosity. That gets rid of frustration, because I'm not expecting anything to work, but when it does, happy surprise.
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dg-publish: true
created: 2024-07-01
modified: 2024-07-01
title: R/DeadBedrooms - Comment by U/Dkotheryyyy on ”My HL Was Right in Our Db.”
source: hypothesis
!tags:: #lit✍/📰️article/highlights
!links::
!ref:: R/DeadBedrooms - Comment by U/Dkotheryyyy on ”My HL Was Right in Our Db.”
!author:: reddit.com
=this.file.name
Reference
=this.ref
Notes
Changing mindset to be able to be around intimacy without expectations: I had to be my own primary source of love and acceptance so that intimacy or not, I'm ok. Gave up (literally despair helped here) my fantasy of my wife and started seeing her as she really is right now. Meant also seeing her as sometimes annoying, stupid, rude, etc. Also meant being curious about what really works for her and willing to accept that something can work one time, but not other times. I.e. she is a constantly changing mystery, so I am constantly in a state of curiosity. That gets rid of frustration, because I'm not expecting anything to work, but when it does, happy surprise.
- No location available
-