!tags:: #lit✍/🎧podcast #status🚦/🟡yellow
!links:: Needs Assertiveness Communication Boundaries

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Reference

• The Baggage Reclaim Sessions: Ep. 205: Four steps to assertively communicating what you want to do

Notes

1. Work out what you want to do vs what you think the other person expects of you. We often have a good sense for what we want to do (or kinda want to do), but don't have a good sense for what we DON'T want to do
   • If it turns out that there's a discrepancy between what you want to do and what you THINK the other person wants to do, then that means you need to go to that person and clarify if that is actually the case
2. Decide what you want to do and actively think about how best to communicate that want
3. Identify your desired outcome - e.g. "I say (this)", "I do (this)". The desired outcome is NOT getting someone else to feel/do (this). Don't try to control the uncontrollable.
4. Cut the fluff. Communicate what is/isn't possible for you. Don't lecture people/tell a story about why you came to (X) opinion. Lead with your boundaries and add in details as necessary.
   • If you need more time, simply say "Let me get back to you about that" - this is not a deferment, it's a gesture of respect for the person's request -- I NEED to do this more